If I Call You For Bail Money

Imagine waking up at 6 AM to a text that says "If I call you for bail money, please call your brother Mark."  Of course the next thing I did was reach for my glasses so that I could read what was going on.  

My friend Kent, who is hilarious and unpredictable on any given day, has texted me.  Apparently, he was sound asleep at 4 AM; like most people in the quiet town of Hickory, NC.  When the sound of someone talking outside his bedroom window awakens him, he peers outside and is shocked to see a guy in his son Alex's truck.  He takes off...grabs a gun, runs down the hall, yells to Alex, and out the back door he goes.  A guy wearing a black hoodie and tan pants, jumps out of Alex's truck and runs to a waiting car at the driveway. 

I know the sight of a butt-naked man, pointing a gun, and yelling profanities has scared the bejesus out of this would-be thief.  Kent gets even madder because he can't get the gun to fire!  It's Alex's gun and Kent's not familiar with the safety mechanism.  He's mad-as-Hell, standing in his backyard, butt-naked, and looking disgusted at the gun, as the would-be thieves escape down the street.  After a few minutes to calm down, return to the house and put on a pair of shorts, he calls the police. 

For most people the story would end after the police officer takes the report.  But no, not for Kent.  He believes he knows who has targeted Alex's truck for a break in and wants to make sure they don't come back.  Once the police are gone, he tells Alex to stay in the house and cranks up the truck to go in search of the suspects.  Alex decides he's not leaving without him and hops in on the passenger's side.  Both are geared up like it's the Wild, Wild, West and headed North to the house, of who they suspect was wearing the black hoodie and tan pants. 

At 6:30 AM Kent's knocking on the front door of the dad of the suspect, recounting what has happened, and questioning the whereabouts of this man's son.  Thankfully, for my piece of mind, nothing of consequence happens, as the dad is holding a riffle and listening to them tell their story with their guns holstered. Surprisingly, the dad doesn't seem shocked by this early morning encounter.  Neither, does he know the whereabouts of his son, who is reportedly strung out on methamphetamines.  After this rather cordial conversation, considering the topic, they leave the man's front porch. They drive around the area for a little while, looking for the suspect's get-away car.  Eventually, they decide to end the search and head back to Hickory for some much needed breakfast.

Warning to would-be thieves and strung out meth-heads, steer clear and don't try to steal anything from Wild, Wild, West Kent.