Don't Chew Tobacco On A Carnival Ride

I was listening to Sirus XM Radio Comedy and Bill Cosby was joking about when he was little and his first experience chewing tobacco.  It bought back a memory of my cousin Jonathan, "Jomp" for short.

My family which included my sister and her kids, my brother, and a few of my cousins were at the North Carolina State Fair. Jomp had been chewing tobacco and I had been fussing that he needed to stop because it wasn't good for him.  Of course he paid me no attention and continued to chew and spit tobacco. Yuck! A little while later we decided to ride a spinning ride; named the Hurricane or Cyclone.

You have to understand the ride to appreciate the story.  It's a huge round barrel shaped ride that spins around-and-around.  We walked single file into the ride and when everyone was in, we leaned back against the wall of the ride onto individual boards with wheels. It was back in the day, so I don't remember strapping in the ride with a harness or belt.  Once everyone was in place, the ride started to spin around.  It got faster and faster until the board which we were now pressed against started to roll up the wall with us on it.  The force of spinning kept us pressed against the board.  As I'm screaming, crying, and laughing all at the same time, I look beside me at Jomp.  At that moment he takes a big gulp and starts to turn a pale green color. He's just swallowed that yucky chunk of tobacco! Eew! I start to laugh even harder until he looks like he's going to blow.  Oh, no! It's still funny but not so much since I envision him throwing up with us all spinning around. Thankfully, after a few more minutes of spinning the ride finally slows down, and we glide down from the top on our boards.  All I can do is laugh and try not to wet my pants as we stumble drunkenly out of the ride. The rest of the family are waiting outside and asking how we enjoyed the ride.  I'm bent over laughing and wiping tears from my eyes as Jomp bolts to the nearest trash can to throw up.

The moral of this story is not only don't chew tobacco but definitely don't chew it on a carnival ride.